HOW TO LOVE UNCONDITIONALLY

Giving unconditional love requires you to love without any expectations. It seems difficult to only love and not demand anything in return in today's world where everyone is selfish and egotistic. But even in this world we see many examples of unconditional love, for example the love a mother gives to her child, the love between two life partners and the love bestowed upon siblings. To love unconditionally you will have to learn to sacrifice your self, your desires, and most importantly your ego. Lets find out how to love unconditionally and give happiness to a person without demanding anything in return.

First of all you have to remember that you are not supposed to expect anything from the person you love. Its true that love makes its way itself. When you love somebody with so much passion and ardor, its sure to come round in one way or another. But if somehow you dont get as much as you give, dont complain or argue. Always keep in mind that loving others and giving them everything you have will make you satisfied and happy with yourself.

You need to develop a strong will power to be able to love unconditionally. At some point in our lives we all demand some kind of love and want to express our own love for someone. Believe in the principle of giving more and demanding less. When someone asks you for a favor always be ready to give it. Never complain that you dont have enough or you have other tasks to do. Set your priorities in such a way that everyone else comes first and your own demands come last.

When you love somebody unconditionally you want the best for that person. Think positively about them even if they make mistakes or do not return your feelings. Give them sincere advice about their future and other decisions. Always look around for the betterment of your loved ones without any envy on your part. If you have to sacrifice something of your own for them, dont hesitate to do so. Only then you will truly be able to love unconditionally.

Remember that unconditional love is given without any expectations or limitations. You dont define any scope of your love or that how long will you love a person. This is an eternal feeling which should be kept alive in all circumstances and all situations. Never lose hope and keep on loving people who are dear and close to you, only then you will be able to live a completely satisfied and emotionally balanced life.

TRUE LOVE: How to find one

True love is not to be found at a certain place, at a certain age, or with a certain person. True love is something that is under our control on the giving end, while at the receiving end we must risk everything for the chance of true love.

True love is not the same as feeling in love. Feelings come and go Sleepiness in the morning gives way to hunger in the afternoon. Both feelings disappear with the administration of a coffee and some food. Feeling in love comes and goes as we get what we want (or are deprived of it). It is important for it serves to connect us to another person long enough for us to explore our relationship further. Feeling in love can vanish as quickly as a thief in the night.

True love can only occur with true acceptance. Acceptance involves an intimate knowledge of another. How can we truly love that which we don't truly know? Without intimate knowledge, we will only have our idea of the other. It will be our idea that we accept. It will be our idea that we love and treasure. When we discover the other's core values, beliefs, desires, and history, we may be appalled and demand that the other conform to our idea of how he or she should be. We find that we have an apple and not an orange. But, we cannot make an apple into an orange.

Discovering that we never really knew someone, we discover that we never really loved that person either. There is still a chance for love, but it will require patience, time, and a getting to know someone for the first time--even if you have been together for 20 years. Once you know what before you did not, you cannot return to your previous illusion.

In order to love truly, we must accept another person, but what does that mean? Does that mean we must like everything that he or she does? If that were the case, true love would be impossible even for God. Who is perfect, without blemish, honorable in every way, never having done any wrong or thinking any bad thought? Most of us have fallen far short of even mediocre expectations.

Acceptance means that we know both good and bad about the other and have decided that we will take the good part of that person as well as the bad. It means that we have decided that what we like far outweighs what we don't like. It also means that we will not in any way--in our thoughts, speech, or actions--try to change that part of the other that we don't like.

When we try to change something about another or withhold our love from another because of some characteristic they have, we deem them unacceptable. Most of the time, they will get the message and it will pain them even as it pains us. Most of the things which are unacceptable to us about another are also unacceptable to the other, though through weakness or circumstance they have little power to change it.

How can I love you knowing that you have done such and such? How can I love you as long as you are doing such and such? Well, in point of fact you cannot love until you give up thinking, hoping, wishing, demanding, pleading, or pressuring the other to change that thing in order to become more acceptable to you and thus become more easy to love.

Of course, there are things that we will not be able to ignore, tolerate, or let go of. These are the things that will prevent us from truly loving the other. They must either be changed or we must be willing to live with a partial love, just as we can eat around the bruise on a banana. We will wish we didn't know or couldn't see that blemish in the other. I avoid saying "partner,| because the other may be your parent, your child, or your friend, as well as your lover.

Now you can see that for someone to truly love you, they must truly know you. And that means helping them to truly see you. The more you withhold the less of you they will know and the more they will love their idea of you rather than what you consider to be you. On the other hand, the more you share of yourself, the greater the chance that something about you will be unacceptable to them. If it is something that you can change, then there is hope. If it is something they can truly let go of, then there is hope. But, if they cannot let go of it in their mind, then it will dilute their love for you. They will be like the child who knows there is no monster under the bed but who is afraid to look--secure only as long as they can avoid thinking about the monster.

How many people in this world have true love? Is it really possible for a human to know everything about another? If they could, how could they possibly accept those things? Perhaps the way out of this dilemma is to share enough of ourselves that we are content the other person knows the essential us. Although we have done many things in the past, we have changed. Maybe some of those things that we did years ago are no longer a reflection of who we truly are now. When we forgive ourselves, those things need to be dropped in a mental ocean or we will become unacceptable to ourselves.

We must also not demand that the other share everything in order that we can carefully examine and scrutinize. We must be willing to forgive even without knowing, because if we knew then some things we could not forget. God forgives and forgets, but we are handicapped in not being able to forget. If the other has done something or you have done something that is in the past and no longer is a reflection of current self, then leave it in the past.

True love, then, takes time, sharing (of our essential selves), withholding of that which is negative and irrelevant, and acceptance. We must share at the risk of being rejected and we must get to know the other at the risk of losing our illusions.

Most importantly, true love is not at the whim of fate. It rests in the decisions that we make. Some people will never have it because of their decision to withhold their essential self or because of their demand that the other be something they are not. We must risk looking at the monster under the bed and make peace with it.

NIGERIANS:Our present decisions and habits can change our past errors

Habit is the tendency to behave in particular way or do a particular thing regularly are repeatedly over a long period of time.
Basically, your habit describes your personality as such it is the habit that you have imbibed that will show the stuff you are made of, or better still the fruit you bear in life.
Friends there is no doubt that your habit determines the kind of destiny you have to enjoy. Habits can be good or bad. However your habit is a determinant factor in what you become in life hence this calls for us to concertedly address our character failure now.
Wrong habit whether in our private life, national service or in our political life as a nation have been keeping us from growing any further no matter how we pretend? It is evident that the reason thing are the way they are is due to wrong habits of a people who call themselves good ambassadors in Nigeria. The consequences of grabbing bad habits are costly.
It is the time to watch the moral lapses inherent in our society as the real problem both the religious and government institutions should address.

For me, such problems as bribery, kick backs, diversion of public funds, lateness to function or not even keeping to appointment, influence peddling, bribery, fraud, drug peddling, gangsterism, mafia deals, lusting, stealing, robbery, impatience, additions and uncontrollable immoral burning desires, such habits that seek to promote inducements before services to another must be condemned and we must seize to ask for gratifications before we render legitimate services that we are constitutionally employed to do, take root from wrong habit.

The very implications of running a society with bad moral on its own has also kept a lot of people from taking possession of what belongs to us, no matter the effort given the huge human resources and the surplus natural endowment we are blessed with as a nation.
It is not needless to trumpet that great nations have only been built on the platform of good and great habits. So the truth is, your habit describes the original of you. Looking at the scripture, the Bible says that “as a man thinketh so is he” . therefore, you cannot have a bad habit of corruption and laziness but yet expect to get an excellent result at the end. This too is impossible. Nigerians today cannot have leaders who lack the habit and courage to confront negative vices and overcome immorality in public services.

Please, our wrong habits have not been doing us any good and we all know, so why we continue to run a negative life of service to to our country? To posterity it gives no hope, to our present day youths, it leaves a gloomy future for us.

There is a whole lot of good habits as well as there are a whole lot of bad habits. But the good thing is that if you want to get to your promised land of joy, peace, happiness, plenty etc. there is every need for you to develop a consciously but transformed habit which will correct and substitute for the wrong habits you have grown up with that are also sinful before God.
Better habits have the capacity to bring transformation to out country as a nation if at all we can achieve the vision 2020 , or even the millennium development goal, we cannot succeed nationally without working on our habits, particularly in the discharge of our duties to our mother-land. No doubt good habits have helped some leaders to access their place in destiny and also contribute to great development in their nations and careers.
I disagreed that your old habits can be over by merely wishing it, and dropping them and remains empty. Not at all, you must definitely take the extra step to replacing your old habits with new habits to be totally set free.

Let me now say that for us in Nigeria we have kept rendering very wrong stewardship to our count, no matter our placement. And this is based on wrong habits learn t. We have kept withdrawing from our national moral account and this is too far becoming a way of life.
Friends, I tell you, we can comfortably say based on the definition above, our habits when positive has the tendency to promote us to the place of positive heights while bad habits no doubt will lead us to the place of struggles and failure, such a place that we are today.
Therefore in the interest of Your country Nigeria, for the sake of the plan of God for our life and the real purpose of this writing, what morality in the nation is encouraging you to do now is to cultivate those good habits that will help you to actualize destiny and overcome corruption in this land.

I want to agree without any prejudice that we can change from what ever habit we have formed that is holding us from rising up. You can change and come out of it now if you wish to do so. Habitual studies proven that you can break loose from any habit in just twenty one days if only you will feed your life and thirst with the positive habits that are good and holy.